Shauna Sands Update and more October 29, 2009
Posted by Nathan in Fantasies.Tags: April, Bella, Leena, porn, pornstars, Shauna Sands, Vivid
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Well it appears that the video, Shauna Sands Exposed, by Vivid will now be officially released on or around Nov. 6th.
A few weeks back I mentioned I was having some memories of some old skool porn I once had starring Leena and a very young (18) Jenna Jameson that I was looking into re-acquiring. I actually did a digital download and paid a bit more than I would have liked too, and I have mixed feelings about teh experience: First, looking back at the Leena tapes…well, they didn’t hold up as well as I first imagined they would. At about $18 for a digital download (ugg), the quality hadn’t improved at all. They were basically old VHS tapes that someone had converted to DVD digital format, however, the graininess, sounds drops, color distortion, and an occaisional VHS tape tracking hiccup showed up. And while Leena was indeed as hot as I remembered her to be, the other’s did seem dated in the late 80’s early 90’s attire and actor Jonathan Morgan is just plain goofy. There wasn’t as much Leena as I had hoped.
The Jenna download was much better. I think she was only 18 at the time, not as much ‘porn’ makeup, much more amateur style, and her moans and excitement were 100% believable. The only drawback was that it was a Randy West scene and at the time he was clearly starting to show his age. The other scenes were good as well, as good as you can get from a VHS tape again originally filmed in the early 90’s. Again, the cost was about $18.
Sometimes I find it hard to justify spending any kind of money on that stuff, especially ‘older’ stuff in the modern age of HD, gonzo, and so much good stuff…like Reality Kings. They have a lot of variety and a ton of stuff for $30 a month. On occassion, that is few and far between, I’ll slap down the $30 fee and get a ton of movies to download and it’s definetly more bang for your buck that a single $18 VHS quality video. And lets not forget how many free sites are out there as well….plenty.
Getting back to ‘celebrity’ tapes……well, I do actually find them very interesting and titalizing…as if they were ‘forbidden’. I’ve seen the Pam Anderson/Tommy Lee, Kim Kardashian/Ray Jay, Paris Hilton/boyfriend, Collin Farrel/model girlfriend, Vince/Janine tape to name a few and for the most part I’ve liked them all. But I all saw bootlegs of these and never paid a cent.
However when it comes to this new one with Shauna, I am very tempted to drop the $35 for a 2-disc collection. I have no idea what is on the second disc, but after seeing some of the stills and a teaser trailer….I find myself getting very worked up over her. It appears she has dropepd her suit against Vivid which makes it even more suspicious to me that this isn’t a publicity stunt or intentional leak. In the end, I really don’t care….I am really looking forward to seeing and maybe even owning this tape.
Hope that doesn’t make me sound as a real porn degenerate or deperate loser. In a way though, I could see how you guys might think that….tapes are released all the time, but only this one have I been actively looking forward to.
On the personal front, it has been a little slow going. I have not returned Bella’s contact at all as it brings up to many emotions for me that I don’t feel like I can deal with right now.
I also recently ran into an ex girlfriend of mine that I dated only for a few months about 10 years ago. It was somewhat awkward for me bordering on uncomfortable. She is single and now a mother with no contact with the father and has also gained about 70+ lbs. I’m sorry if that sounds mean and callous, but due to her short stature, she looks a bit ‘big’. We ran into each other at a party of mutual friends and I had no idea what to say. We didn’t break up on bad terms or anything, it was the fact I just wasn’t into her but I know she liked me quite a bit. The uncomfortable part was at this party she began flirting with me again, and I had NO desire to flirt back. The day after the party my friend called me to let me know that she is still carrying a torch for me and started asking questions about my situation. She’s a ‘nice’ person, but I really don’t want any further contact.
Becky has disapeared from the face of the planet. A fun ‘fling’ that I may have wanted to explore further, but doesn’t look like that’s gonna happen.
April called me last week now that she is feeling much better and we had an conjugal encounter last Saturday. It was ‘fun’…could have be more ‘fun’ if she’d just learn to relax, but she seemed a bit more plaful than usual. Since this post is already way too long, maybe next one will be that encounter. It was kinda funny, as well as erotic, to say the least.
Busted! July 10, 2009
Posted by Nathan in Random Musings.Tags: April, date night, sex-toy
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Friday’s, when it comes to lunch, is always a double-edged sword. On the one hand, it’s casual day and I get to wear jeans and a t-shirt in these warmer summer months. This past week I feel as if I have been working like a hebrew slave, so the chance I get to wear something a bit more relaxing and cooling is always nice. Also, because it’s Friday, we tend to take a few extra minutes of liberty when we go to lunch. Our typical hour can sometimes stretch to a whopping 1 hr 10 minutes….Japanese company and all…you take what you can get.
On the flip side, without sounding like too much of a prick, I work with a lot of dorks. That is to say of the stereotypical ‘nerdy’ variety where fashion, haircuts, and social discussions seem to be a stumbling block. Half the guys I work with I swear are still virgins or haven’t been laid in years, and in someways these lunches are a test of my patience. I can’t always talk shop, nor do I want to. If I’m going out to lunch, I want to enjoy it and leave work at the office. Why do I want to go out to lunch if we are just going to talk about work at lunch?
Today we went to ‘Soup Plantation’. Not sure if you know what one of those are, but it basically ‘tries’ to be a somewhat above average soup and salad buffet place. Maybe it’s one step above Denny’s and CoCo’s on the atmosphere scale, but it’s far from ever being posh.
At the table next to us, was a living, breathing Barbie doll (sorry if you ladies find that offensive, but I’m using it as a pleasant descriptor). She had to be at least 5′8″ before her 3″ pumps. Skinny, late 20’s, beautiful skin, long blond hair pulled back into a free flowing pony-tail that came halfway down her back.. Simple makeup and silver stud earrings. Gray, form fitting business slacks with a simplistic and classy plaid print, and the icing on the cake was her perfectly shaped ‘D’ cups protruding straight out on her black, sleeveless tank top. She was a ‘9′ on a scale of 10, easily, and not overly done up.
But as you can imagine, she caught all of our eyes, and because my co-workers lack certain ’social graces’, they all began to experience whiplash at the same time. Because this is a buffet, every time she got up to get something additional, the same comedic display would take place…..5 nerdy guys made it pretty obvious that they were ogling her. I was one of of those of five, I admit, but I’d like to think I can camouflage my glances much more expertly than these MAC wannabes.
On her last trip back to her table, I heard her say to one of her girlfriends “Gosh, everytime I get up these guys keep staring at me.”, like she just couldn’t understand why we were such obvious pervs.
Uh, DUH!….Maybe because this is Soup Plantation and you are the hottest thing that has graced the corn bread bar in like 5 years? You’re walking into the domain of what Wal Mart shoppers consider a 5 star establishment dressed like you came from the set of The Hills, and your boobs are $1 short of an exotic pole dancers, and you wanna know why we are looking at you? Lady, not only am I looking at you, I have already ate you out and took you from behind in my head.
In her defense however, I suppose I’d feel a bit creeped out if a bunch of dudes looking like they just got off the short bus were staring at you while you ate. Anyway, we were busted….and I don’t feel all that guilty about it.
A few more hours left before I’m off for the day and go on my three day sojourn with April and my best friend and his wife. I’m sporting a new short haircut and a little color that I got from the sun last weekend, and I suppose I’ll do some serious manscaping this evening in the shower. Everyone seems excited to go. I can’t wait to try some new restaurants, hang by the pool, drink some fruity cocktails, and basically have loads of sex in my hotel room over the next 72 hours. At least in my head, I plan on being naked much more than being dressed behind closed doors, and I’m taking my new camera. I even packed a new ‘toy’ for April to use on herself as I sit back and watch. The only thing I’m a bit nervous about is since we have adjoining rooms, if my friend and his wife will hear us, or us them over the next few days.
An itch to scratch July 1, 2009
Posted by Nathan in Random Musings.Tags: April, Jenna Jameson, porn, pornstars, Shane
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I hate when these things happen.
I get a thought in my head at the most inopportune time, and then can’t shake it all. It almost becomes borderline OCD for me, and that’s how I’m feeling about now.
Last night I went to bed at a relatively decent hour, after talking to an old college friend on the phone and sipping on a very heavy handed whisky on the rocks (needless to say, I have a slight fog in my head right now). I fell asleep relatively fast, but then awoke pretty widely at about 2:30am.
For the next couple of hours, all I could do was toss and turn and stare blindly at the ceiling. It wasn’t that I was too warm, or couldn’t get comfortable, I just ‘woke up’…and that sux, knowing full well I’m going to pay for it later sometime the next day.
Anyway, here’s comes the thought: Old porn tapes of mine that I owned 10 years ago that were thrown out, and now I can’t get the scenes out of my head. Why this happens, I don’t know, but all of a sudden there’s Randy West and Jenna Jameson in her 1st mainstream porn debut at the nubile age of 19. Yes, before she became a household name, before she was ever married, before the piercing and silicon enhancements….a perfect girl-next-door at age 19 who just likes to fuck. I believe it was ‘Up & Cummers #8′, and then she did a F/F/M follow-up in ‘Up & Cummers #9′ again with Randy West and now I forget the other girls name, but she was already kinda mainstream. What made this so hot was how Jenna was dressed….this tight little late 80’s black skirt/body stocking thing with a zipper down front.
I don’t know how many times I watched that tape over and over again. I’m surprised I didn’t wear that one out. I don’t think I ever really needed to watch the whole scene either, usually the 1st 10 minutes, or more accurately to where Jenna begins to unzip her top is all I needed to bust a nut.
I ‘had’ to throw those tapes away some time back when I was kinda in a relationship. The girl I was with (monogamous) was very self-conscious and didn’t really understand why guys were visual and why I owned these tapes. The thought process was she believed she was all I needed for visual stimuli and got jealous and pretty much game me an ultimatum one day to throw the tapes away, or I wasn’t going to get the ‘real’ thing from her anymore.
So under some duress, self-imposed guilt, a semi-half-hearted belief I was too old for this ‘porn’ nonsense anymore I chucked them. And it only took less than a day to regret that decision.
Now with the advent of Blu-Ray and DVD’s, I’m seriously thinking of re-buying those ‘vintage’ episodes. Yeah, I know it’s not ‘vinatge’ as in classic 70’s porn with very little genital grooming that everyone seems to be going back to, but late 80’s to mid 90’s is classic for me now. So what if fashion is a little dated by 2009 standards? Those scenes of a fresh Jenna Jameson before the fame and drama that became her life are so much better than her current and recent stuff.
The same goes for another starlett who goes by the name of Shane. She had a series of tapes with her then boyfriend and then went on to do her own series “Shane’s World” before she got out of the business, got married and had a family. She was the one that introduced me to ‘gonzo’ porn…the style of no scripts, no sets, no makeup, no stupid jazz riffs…just a camera following her around in her life and her encounters. It was like reality porn before the Internet took off to what it is today, and I’d like to think ushered in the whole genre of 90’s style ‘real’ amateur porn. I’m missing a few tapes of her and her antics as well. There was one in particular called ‘Bustin Loose’, (I think) where she and her girlfriend take a young T.T. Boy to Vegas for his birthday. Of course, it’s scene after scene in various hotel rooms with different girls, and there is one scene in particular where T.T is tied up in a chair, blindfolded, and in his skivvies, where Shane hires one of the cutest Asian escorts in town…and then proceeds to film a very lengthy 40 minutes encounter that includes lap dances, teases de jour, a shower scene, and then culminates into one of the most aggressive hotel bedroom romps ever…..fabulous.
I think I may have to buy these later today for old times sake.
Other than that, I’m just under 2 weeks before April and I and my best friend and his wife go out of town for a weekend. I have so many devious plans in my head on how to just wreck April and make this a memorable 3 day trip. I got a new camera and she’s let me take pictures before. I’m wondering if she’ll let me bring a video camera this time. I’m not even there yet and I’m already picturing her going down on me on the suite couch, or me doing her in the shower, and basically walking around the room nekkid until we need to go out for food or something.
Double Date: Dinner, Dancing, Drinks January 21, 2009
Posted by Nathan in April.Tags: April, date night
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At the last minute Dale called me up to tell me he and his lady were running a tad behind schedule, so instead of me making the trip to their place, just to go on without them and meet them there which was okay by me.
I didn’t get to fancy in my duds, but did dress up a bit for the night out. Sporting a nice printed club shirt (the buttons are dice), jeans, black leather boots, and a spritzing of cologne I made my way over to April’s.
April was also wearing jeans that nicely hugged her hips, a black studded leather belt, and some sort of brown blouse I can’t really find the words for. Not to sound like a fashionista, but it was kinda non-descript. Her hair was done up straight, a little lip gloss, and her own perfume.
We made our way to the restaurant with a bit of small talk, her cell-phone annoyingly going off every few minutes, but I give her credit….she didn’t answer once. That was a nice change of pace, as April is usually stuck into one of these endless and inane texting conversations with on of her girlfriends that are devoid of substance. Overall the drive was nice and neither one of us brought up he earlier shopping spree or what may transpire lately. Instead we listened to my CD’s and talked about Dale always thinks the eateries he chooses are always ‘the bomb’, when in fact they are just pretty average. Same with this one. Dale described as a superb Italian cuisine that really stands out against all the other Italian places in the county.
Er…not so much. It was ‘okay’ at best and April and I smiled to each other in mutual understanding when Dale went on and on about the quality of our meals. His lady looked awesome as well this evening, sporting a nice, long blue denim skirt, a white blouse open enough to show off some silver bling she was wearing. She’s a very nice woman, and I’ll admit….on more than one occasion I have wondered what she is like in bed. She drops hints from time to time about her and Dale’s sex life as innocent banter, but Dale often rolls his eyes and tells me she exaggerates. I remember once, a long time ago she mentioned her and Dale sleep nude because it’s just easier when she gets in the mood, but Dale told me later “Wishful thinking….doesn’t happen like that.” Oooo…Kay, I wasn’t looking for a qualifier statement.
Anyway, after dinner we decided to walk over to a bar that Dale and I used to frequent years ago. He said it had been remodeled as of late and now have dancing. “Sure.”, I said and we all made the few block trek in the cold night air to the bar.
It really was nice inside, much nicer than I ever remembered it being. Much more open inside, cleaner and brighter. The girls had a few f00-foo drinks, and Dale and I had a double shot of whisky with a beer chaser.
The band was really good. A cover band with a very jazz and blues take on many popular songs. I found myself tapping my toes and bobbing my head to the swanky sounds and wishing I was a little bit more buzzed and that my present company enjoyed dancing as much as I do….they don’t.
There was a bachlorette party going on as well, a gaggle of girls letting loose and drinking freely. The bride-to-be was looking a little happy and was surrounded by quite a few of her drunk girlfriends of all ages as they dragged her out to the dance floor to dance the night away.
Then walked in three smoking hot girls, who looked like they just turned 21. The first was a blond wearing a one piece baby-blue party dress who was probably the most conservative of the bunch. The second was a very tall and leggy brunette with tight blue jeans on, white long sleeve sweater, ‘fuck-me’ eye makeup, and a sexy scarve swathed belt wrapped around her waist. Finally, the best for last and both Dale and I noticed her right away and I’m sure our eyes bugged out as did everyone else in the place. There isn’t much to say about her…she was cute like the rest, but it was her top that blew up the joint. It was a backless blouse with such a low plunging neckline up front (think J’Lo from that award show a few years back) that it basically reached her belly button. This allowed for her tits to be basically out in the open as she was clearly wearing no bra and every person in the joint got plenty an eyeful of side boob from all angles. Clearly, short of showing her hard nipples, it left nothing to the imagination, and I was almost straining if I could see double sided tape as I have no clue how she kept her nipples covered.
Of course, being a guy, my libido began to rev up quite a bit and I instantly wished I was 20 something again and came alone. I was picturing tossing this one around all over my house and wondered if her friends were so inclined as well.
But within moments of my own sordid daydream, I brought myself back to reality and reminded myself inside to channel this energy to April later in the evening. It was here April noticed me looking and leaned into my ear…”I suppose you’re looking at her chest?” (Gulp…busted…) “Well, we all are.”, she said and smiled at me. “You ready to take me home soon?” I nodded yes and we began to down our drinks with a bit more aggression.
We must have been at the club for about two hours, and realizing it would take an additional 30-35 minutes to get back to Aprils, we all walked back to our cars, said goodbye to our friends, and went on our way.
As we began to drive back, April placed her hand on my right thigh and inched its way to my package which she gave a slight squeeze which began to stir in response, “I hope you have the energy.”
Oh, I do…I do.
To be continued (the good stuff)
TMI Tuesday… January 13, 2009
Posted by Nathan in April, Mary, Random Musings.Tags: April, kissing, Mary, sex, TMI
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Yeah, it’s not Tuesday Turn-ons….I still haven’t picked a topic for that today, but maybe this will give you a little more insight on me, Nathan.
1. On a scale of 1 to 10, how satisfied are you with your sex life?
Unfortunately, the more I think about it, the higher the number was a few years back. Not sure I ever achieved an actual ‘10′…I suppose that would mean my girlfriends were just as creative, willing, aggressive and naughty as I am….and sadly that hasn’t happened in quite some time. I suppose the highest moments were my college years and maybe just after college. Solid 8’s many a time. Last year I think I may have been at my lowest…3…and I’d chalk up one of those points due to my own solo efforts. Right now April has taken slight more interest in her activities in the bedroom, so maybe it’s a borderline 5 right now (up from 4). Yikes, I’m kinda getting depressed just reading this as I write. I haven’t had much time as of late to seek out more enlightened partners or have the energy to sit down and tell April my concerns.
2. If someone shoves you up against the wall while kissing you, your reaction is?
Release. Ladies, beleive it or not, once ina blue moon a man woudl be very excited if a woman takes the gumption be agressive and take charge. I’d probably submit and relish the moment in relaxed bliss….my mind going a million miles an hour wondering if she’ll go further, go south, etc. But seeing that I can be a freak at times, I’d also probably wonder if my breath is fresh and if I have clean undies on.
3. What is the most romantic thing anyone has ever said or done to you?
Wow, this is a very tough question to answer and I’m not sure there is one incident that just blows me away above any other. Different girlfriends through the years have done special things for me that made me feel special. One girl sent me on a scavenger hunt at a local mall that shop owners were in on….at the end was a clue to a hotel room where she was waiting in lingerie. There was a lot of effort in that one. Another used to write me actual love letters that were very sweet. Another used to just stare in my eyes and whisper….her words always magic and sultry…I believed everything she told me…it seemed very genuine and heartfelt. But I’m not sure even the best ones I could qualify as overly ‘romantic’ in the truest sense of the word.
4. Where is the most unusual place you have ever had sex?
I literally had sex once outside of a bar, in a back alleyway, between dumpsters, at 1:30am. It was primal, public, and perhaps a bit of a rush in the fear of getting caught.
5. How do you like to be kissed?
Passionately and soft and hungry-like. I think I am closer to a woman in thsi regard moreso than being a man. I like tender lips on my ears. I like girls who kiss my neck. But a tender, soft, and exploring kiss with an open mouth sets my motors in motion.
Bonus: Most embarrasing sexual moment?
I wrote about this a long time ago, but once when Mary was straddling me on top and we both climaxed and sat there for a few minutes I began to relax. When Mary dismounted, I noticed the condom was no longer on my person. Then to my horror, I watched Mary basically fist herself in her attempts to fish it out of herself. As this scene unfolded for what seemed like forever I was very slack jawed and mentally scarred.
Frustration December 19, 2008
Posted by Nathan in April, Fantasies, Random Musings, Rants.Tags: April, booty call, frustration, sex, sex-toy
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Will you submit to me in my frustration?
I discovered a blog last week maintained and writtem by a young woman who comes across as very erotic. Erotic in the sultry and seductive sense, not the wham-bam-thankyou-ma’am sense, and it’s quite evident that she takes great care and thought in crafting her tales and insights.
I like PhaedraFallen because for her purported age (19 I think), she comes across pretty cerebral, and I like brainy, or to put it a better way – well worded and educated women. Smart is sexy. And you can get a lot of insight from someone who is well versed in vocabulary and structure….not like here, where my mind just seems to run on random thoughts and run on sentences half the time.
Anyway, she posted a picture (which I shamelessy stole btw for this post) on a new toy she and her friend ‘X’ recently purchased and experimented with. The image on the box coupled with her musings on the night her and ‘X’ shared with this painted a very nice image in my own head, and it’s something I’d like to particpate in with my own sex life.
You’ve been rading my own blog long enough to know that April and I are this on-again, off-again ‘thing’. I wish I could be more specific in my own definition, but I can’t, because as much as I attempt to put a label on us and what we are together, I just can’t. Lately April has lost a lot of weight, and she looks great. I probably need to tell her that more often, but for some reason I forget and only think of it after the fact when she’s not around….which doesn’t really do me any goood or win me any points with her. Now if I could only get her to stop smoking….it may be a different ball game altogether.
Last week, her monthly visitor arrived so we never got together to play. That kinda sucks because even though neither one of us are into earning or deploying ‘red wings’ with each other, there are other things we can do. I mean…I wouldn’t refuse a blow job from her, nor would I reject nibbling and sucking on her breasts during this time…but it just doesn’t seem to be April’s cup of tea…and I don’t push (my error?).
So this weekend, starting tonight was the perfect opportunity for some holiday lovin’. I’ve been actually thinking about it for a few days now, and the image of setting up this contraption on my bed, lighting a few candles, blindfolding her, and then taking her freshly shaven puss for my own pleasure (and hers) has been mentally intoxicating and has perpetuated a few unscripted hard-ons for myself the last few days.
Unfortunately, our ‘timing’ and ‘communication’ always seems a bit off and for the life of me I never see it coming. April has the ability to open her mouth and say the most absurd and aggravating things at the weirdest moments that more often than not spark an argument or at least gets my blood boiling in a ‘bad mood’ sort of way.
Like today.
We spoke early this morning before both of us went to work and I was attempting to arrange getting togther this weekend. Not necessarily for sex per-se (though I suppose in the back of my mind it would have been nice), but at least to hang out, have dinner, go to a neighborhood party, etc. Instead she made one of her famous off the cuff remarks, which turned my amorous and good natured mood 180 degrees around and kinda upset me. Not upset in the fact I’m sad…more in the vain she pissed me off…so I cut the conversation short and told her I had to go….basically, yet politely, hanging up on her.
Now for the past couple of hours I’ve been very uptight and somewhat smoldering under the surface. Part of me wants to strangle her (metaphorically that is…a figure of speech for all those thingking I’m about to go postal..I’m not), the other part wants to take this pent up frustration and negative energy I’m currently harnessing and just fuck the crap out of her over and over again tonight not really caring what she has to say…(not a rape fantasy at all) just a let me take out my frustration on pleauring you silly until neither one of us can walk and nothing needs to be said between us.
Getting the band back together and readying to party like a rock star December 5, 2008
Posted by Nathan in April, Random Musings.Tags: April, party, Rock Band
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As I alluded to yesterday, the whole social networking things is a surreal experience. After I got home last night I signed on and was sent a friend request by some 40 year old woman who labeled one of my pictures as ‘cutie’.
As we all know, pictures can be deceiving. Her profile picture was nice, but as I delved into her more personal pictures that she posted in an album titled ‘Random 2008′, I couldn’t help but think British teeth would put her own to shame. I’m sorry, but at 40 years old, there are just something you need to take care of by now. You can’t proposition someone, and expect a favorable response on the web, when some of your teeth took a left turn at Albuquerque, and the others migrated south for the winter. Needless to say, I haven’t responded and don’t think I will be. Too bad, she seemed since and fairly attractive otherwise. And the fact she was east-Indian was a tad intriguing. He profile stated she liked Punjabi music. Can’t say I know too many artists in that genre, and I ain’t given up the cow anytime soon.
I received a comment from my HS sweetheart again. It wasn’t much, just a simple “Hi…thinking about you”, but enough to make me ignore it for now and move on to other stuff online lest I sit there and contemplate it too much. Which in fact I inevitably did this morning when I woke up wide awake at 5am and couldn’t fall back to sleep wondering what she was doing right now. The fact that she has kids doesn’t bother me at all. The fact that she has a husband, sadly does, and I’m sure he’s a nice guy and obviously makes here happy. I just can’t help but to think about alternate history and alternate outcomes. So I was a tad sad and decided to get up and make myself some coffee.
I’m gonna try and get my mind off the whole thing both tonight and tomorrow. I received an email earlier today from my friends who are itching to play some Rock Band 2. So my task tonight after work is to stock up on the liquor, and get ready for the guys.
Tomorrow, April invited me to a party one of her friends is throwing. I have mixed feeling about it. I kinda wanna go ’cause I have been stuck at home a lot lately and need to socialize a bit more with both sexes. The hostess, while married, is smoking hot and has flirted with me before and is always kinda touchy-feely around me. There are gonna be other women there as well, but I don’t know there boyfriend status at all. Now you’re probably saying “Wait…didn’t you say April is going?” Yes she is, but I already hinted to her about meeting her there and taking my own car. Why you ask? Well, April has a tendency to over-indulge in her drinking among this group, and the last few times I’ve attended this party with her, I either find myself: 1) extremely bored by the end of the night and want to leave but I can’t since we came together, 2) April can be a pain to babysit when she’s drunk and her cuteness can turn to annoyness fairly quickly, 3) I have no idea where April and I stand once again and I can’t sit around to decide if she going to pay attention to me or not. Our roles with each other is still undefined and very complex and confusing….she tends to avoid the subject a lot, and in the slim chance I meet someone interesting and some flirtations are exchanged I don’t want to be put in any more of an awkard position in which I already feel like I’m going to be anyway.
